Chapter 76: Angel in The Night #6

Thursday, January 18, 2018


#6: Song that makes you want to dance
Well, I'm not gonna deny that there're lots of other songs that could build up my dancing desire.. Crazy frog, Pitbull's collection, and even Despacito could filled up the sugar in me but all they provide are catchy musics with no storyline.. And even most of it were just filled up with random words just to fill up the song with something.. But the song below, is just something else...
ps: you might want to fast-forward it a bit as the song starts at 0:37

You are my light in the dark
You are the beating in my heart
But that is not enough
Will I ever be by your side

Your hair is dancing in the wind
Your eyes are burning off my skin
And I'm so happy when I see
That you are smiling back at me

You're leaving burn marks on the ground
Thank you God for what I've found
I don't know how, I don't know why
That you're my angel in the night

I'm not sure if you've heard of any of Basshunter's music but if you did. you'll discover stories behind those catchy musics.. "Angel in the night" is the first song of Basshunter that manage to caught my heart.. There's disco-techno vibe in his music that manage to hype me up by listening to his songs and at least, his songs provides good lyrics.. That's all matters to me.. 😍

Chapter 75: Devil at Heart

Wednesday, January 17, 2018

chapters by flavnesz
source: Yuuta-Apple

I've been trying to become a strange person lately..
I'm not sure if concern is the right vocab..
But I've been listening to random person problems..
And somehow..
I just felt sick of it..

It reminded me to my unwanted past...
I'm not affected emotionally but I was so furious listening to it..
"How to move on..?"
"Why do that person did this to me after years of love..?"
"I felt like just be in relay with someone so that I could forget my feelings to that person.."

Listening to those, pissed me off...
But I tried to compose myself..
And tried my best to help the person.. 

I shouldn't focus on anyone anymore..
Or just maybe...
I should ignore every broken heart..
Because eventually..
That person will learn the lesson by self..

One thing that I had learn from this situation...
A broken heart would barely accept your advice.. 
And all the person would do is just reminiscing the past..
Hoping that things would be back on its place again.. 

And I hated the situation..
Because it was just like a scattered memories.. 
It seems just like a reflection of my yearning heart..

So please, dear self...
Just stop being such an angel..
Because in the end, 
There'll just be a devil at heart instead..  
17/1/2018 : 1.29 AM

Chapter 74: Little Do You Know #5

Monday, January 15, 2018

chapters by razanah anis
#5: Song that needs to be played out loud..
I discover this song almost 3 months before 2017 ended and I started to love this song immediately.. I was addicted to this song till I decided to make it as my ring tone for some period.. 

I love the mixed emotions in it, as if how us, the ladies always think negatively when it comes to love, keeping our insecurities in silent.. Meanwhile the men normally struggle in showing us their concern and to secure our feelings but somehow, they always failed in their attempt.. 
Oh wait, just wait
I love you like I've never felt the pain
Just wait
I love you like I've never been afraid
Just wait
Our love is here and here to stay
So lay your head on me
And no matter how hard love could be, when it comes to the one, both parties would try to hang on and try to make it work, as that's how love should be.. Before you jump into unexpected conclusion, please allow me to clarify a thing.. This song had nothing to do with reminiscing my past.. I just love it on my own for the emotions that both of the singer had and I really think this is too beautiful to be kept in silence.. 😊

Cinephile: If I Stay, The Other Woman, The Giver, You're Not You (2014 Movies)

Friday, January 12, 2018


These movies had been staying in my hard disk, remaining untouched for years.. As the matter of fact, there are hundreds more of old movies that is waiting for their turn.. I downloaded these movies when I was preparing to enter my diploma life, as I was too afraid if my roommates wouldn't like me (I had traumatic high school life) so I prepared various drama and movies to fill the emptiness and little did I know, I would met blast-full roommates for my entire diploma year and plus, I got addicted to korean dramas so.. yeah.... πŸ˜“

I wanted to clear up some spaces of my hard disks and somehow, I felt guilty to just delete them without giving a chance and somehow, I'm slowly opening myself for them again.. I didn't realize I completed these four movies within 24 hours and I was thinking, why not for a short review..? It could even be new to some of you.. πŸ˜†
πŸ“ΊIf I Stay
Synopsis: Mia Hall, a talented young cellist, thought the most difficult decision she would ever have to make would be whether to pursue her musical dreams at prestigious Juilliard or follow her heart to be with the love of her life, Adam, a rock singer/guitarist. However, a car wreck changes everything in an instant, and now Mia's life hangs in the balance. Suspended between life and death, Mia faces a choice that will decide her future.

Review: This story is just something to ponder about, in my opinion.. It's kinda confusing at first, as it kept on flashbacks of Mia's memory randomly but somehow, as the story is moving forward, it's just something for you to look forward.. I'm kinda in love in Adam's character since he had a good bf material with modest and loving attitude, contrary to a normal western rockers attitude while Mia herself, she's a cute introvert which you wouldn't expect she would hold herself well to be with Adam.. However, when you got to choose either to fight for your life or give up, and knowing that all of you family is gone, which path would you choose..?

Self-Rating: ★★★ and a half because it's not that bad.. 

πŸ“ΊThe Other Woman
Synopis: Carly Whitten lives by strict rules when it comes to romantic relationships, but when she falls for suave, handsome Mark King, she begins an affair with him. A surprise visit to Mark's home reveals that he is married to devoted housewife, Kate.Carly and Kate direct their hurt and anger toward Mark, and when they discover yet a third woman caught in his web of lies, the three join forces for revenge.

Review: For someone whom loves light and relaxing movie, this is just something for you.. To be honest, I kinda enjoyed this kind of movie as I don't really need put on full emotions on it..  No intense or cheesy lines, just something for your happy pills.. 

Self-Rating: ★★★★

πŸ“ΊThe Giver
Synopis: Jonas lives in a seemingly idyllic world of conformity and contentment. When he begins to spend time with The Giver, an old man who is the sole keeper of the community's memories, Jonas discovers the dangerous truths of his community's secret past. Armed with the power of knowledge, Jonas realizes that he must escape from their world to protect himself and those he loves -- a challenge no one has ever completed successfully.

Review: If you're a fan of sci-fi movies, or maybe just a fan of Divergent series, this is just something for you.. Well, personally prefer the Divergent series but this one is still an okay movie.. I really love the lesson that they had but somehow, I felt like something is missing at the ending.. I thought it had continuation, something like 2nd movies but realizing that this is the only series, I'm like.. Okay.. There should be more.. "What would happen to this now..? And that..? Just really, this is the end..?" yeah.. Those are what I've been asking for the ending.. 

Self-Rating: ★★★  because I need a better ending..

πŸ“ΊYou're Not You
Synopis: A life-changing bond develops between a woman with ALS whose marriage is on the rocks and the brash collegian  hired to be her assistant.

Review: I wanted to ignore this movie at first, and just delete it but looking at the rating (7.4 imdb), I'm like, okay.. This must be something.. I decided to give it a try and right now, I'm so glad for not deleting it right away.. I would describe this movie similar to "Me Before You" and the only difference is that both main character were girls and it just emphasizes more on friendship.. Well, this movie is just something that I could pour my emotions into.. 

Self-Rating: ★★★  because I swear this movie caught my heart.. 

Chapter 73: Tuhan Jagakan Dia #4

Saturday, January 6, 2018

chapters by razanah anis

A song that reminds you of someone that you rather forget... To be honest, I wanted to update on the forth challenge before 2017 ended, but somehow, I couldn't recall any of the unwanted memories.... I had been looking through my old jams, the indonesian jiwang songs which was part of my soul.. I had been listening to almost everything; 6ixth Sense ( I was a huge fan of this band), Kerispatih, st12 but none got through my soul anymore.. It was like I'm immortal from the songs..  

I even asked my friends and they suggested various songs, Mariah Carey, Taylor Swift, Christina Aguilera;  but again, I felt nothing..  Well, don't get me wrong, I love the songs, I know how heartbreaking the lyrics was but the memories ain't there.. I asked myself, "What's wrong with me..? There's lots of songs that I had been going through that I know, it's connected to me and him but what is the title..?"

I hang out with my friends even longer, and they had been playing lots of jiwang songs, from a song to another, till finally, a familiar song was played and it just gets through my memories.. Listening to the song,I choked up a bit and immediately spoke up, "This is it..! This is the feelings I had been looking for.."

This song was one of the song that I stopped listening to, and surprisingly, this song still took up my emotions a bit at once but now as I'm listening to it again, I'm fine.. Well, the memories might be there but again, I'm moving on.. πŸ’…

Chapter 72: 2018 To-Do List

Wednesday, January 3, 2018

2018 Resolutions
yummy nutella cheesecake baked by my beloved kak chik..πŸ’•
I've been eager to proceed my next chapter as degree student, still in KUPTM KL as I don't want to lose my MARA.. There's almost a second war between me and my dad, as he wanted me to be in government sector, a teacher to be exact.. To fulfill the request, I'm supposed to apply for any IPTA for a better guarantee but still being me, I refused for it as I had been aiming for lecturer instead.. Plus, I don't want to be involved in PTPTN and I was spoiled by MARA during Diploma, surely I want to be spoiled again.. Well at least, I could reduce the burden of my parents by spending using the allowance that had been given to us by MARA... 

Well, the first few months of my degree life might be a pain as I should wait to re-apply my MARA and I might be burdening my parents for a while but thankfully, my dad was okay with it.. Well, he had been opening his heart to accept my journey ever since my graduation day and therefore, there's a few things that I should accomplish this year..

  • Spend Wisely
Since the start might be a pain as I'm depending on my parents and I had to set RM230 monthly just for my rental house, I should lower down my expenses on others by cooking for myself.. You might be thinking, why don't you find a cheaper house or just stay in the hostel..? Well, I did try to look for a cheaper house but failed and to stay in the hostel is more hellish as I can't cook, no washing machine and there's no wifi in the hostel.. To be honest, that RM230 is a complete set of a fully furnished house; bed, locker, kitchen, fridge, washing machine, tv, unifi and bills included..! The best part..? It was just next to my college and it's only 3-5 minutes of walking.. So yup, that's the minimal I could get..

  • Shredding Mission Mode-ON..!
I could restrain my lust on food as I should cook but I'm too lazy to cook delicious meal so diet meal is all I would cook.. Surely, I could reduce my carbohydrate intake, and let's just hope I could be back on track.. It's so hard to be on track, weh..!  Staying home is so hard when you couldn't hold yourself for your mom's meal..😭
  • More Memories with Them..!
2018 to do list
How could I leave these girls behind..? I'm so eager for my degree to start as I could get back to their arms..! 3 years of Diploma and insya-Allah, another 2 years awaits, it's always been them whom stays till the end.. Well, the circle may gets smaller but there's always people come and go in our life and the best would always remain, right..? All I could do is just to appreciate these munch-kins while I could still have them.. πŸ’•

  • Dean List For This Year
I finished my diploma with the first class honor and DL for my final sem but sadly, I'm not part of those "selempang" students as I'm not a DL student of every semester.. My sisters were aggrieved with it as they truely hope I could achieve that title to win my dad's heart but Allah definitely knows better.. During the convocation ceremony, one of the best student whom was sponsored by MARA to study overseas quoted in public," You may try your best for your dreams but without your parents blessings, you would get nowhere...

Thanks to the speech, my father opened up himself and this time, I would not let the opportunity turns into a waste.. I truly hope for linear DL pointer this time.. 

  • Get Organized
chapters by razanah anis
I'm totally not an organized person, tbh.. I'm totally a very random person whom gets things settle only based on her mind.. When I feel like doing something, I would.. Same goes to my diet and expenses.. I installed apps to keep track with my diet and expenses but in the end of the day, I'm just too lazy to update them.. And lastly, I would uninstall them.. The same thing goes to planner.. I had one planner each year with the determination, but in the end of the day, I would forgot to update it.. πŸ˜…

So this time, with a new determination, I decided to just at least, get organized.. In order to be on strictly diet, to keep track on my expenses so I won't be a huge burden to my parents, and to achieve my DL target, I'm so gonna get myself together and be strict to myself.. πŸ’ͺ

I thought there's not much for me to be done but surprisingly, there's more than what I need to cope.. All the best dear self.. πŸ˜‚

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