Chapter 19: Route to Resolution - January

January 29, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. I am being serious when I said that I need to be a grown up and make my life more meaningful.. Since I had updated my to-do list, it's better for me to update the progress, monthly.. Well, I'm the type of person whom always takes thing easily and "Alah, nanti boleh buat lagi." reflected my personality perfectly.. Hopefully, this monthly reflection could change me to become more responsible person in life.. πŸ’ͺ

  • Get a part time job.
My friend and I applied a part time job at Kumon but sadly, I was the only person to get the reply while my friend didn't receive any respond.. Due to that matter, I had to reject the offer as I might need to grab the Uber/Grab car as my work transportation and paying it for myself ain't a good idea.. Plus, the sudden idea of being in short semester made me think the worst.. What if I couldn't cope with it? So yeah, I would prefer to be safe and let's just focus on completing the semester first and probably by August, I am done with my diploma... Only by then, I would get back to you, Kumon!
  • Spend wisely.
I installed a spending tracker apps in my laptop but it's hard for me to update it regularly since I'm not in front of the laptop regularly.. Guess I need to find the similar app to be installed in my phone .. Anyways, I couldn't control myself much in January since it's still early in semester and I took the opportunity to hang out with my friends so most of my money goes to the moment I spent with them (especially on food).. One good thing, I'm able to control myself from make-up stuff.. Gonna improve this from time to time.. Oh wait, I forgot to mention, Most of the money goes to the notes and revision book too.. πŸ˜‡
  • Saving money.
I bought a cute money box with small padlock from Mr.Diy and start the monthly saving challenge.. I  deliberately left it in my Seremban's house closet since I know I would definitely use them if I keep it by my side.. One thing I'm glad the most is Vase keep sending me money and they strictly go into my moneybox, might be not much in amount but hey, I received RM 8.60 in total for this month..! Thank you Vase..! πŸ’–
  • Book writing.
I'm not forgetting this but I'm facing internal conflict with myself a lot this month so yeah, no progress at all.. I was thinking, maybe I should re-publish what I had posted before and maybe, you could give me an opinion whether to proceed or probably, forget it.. 
  • Stop being an angry bird.
I want to proudly announce, Razanah Anis is no longer a grump, angry bird! Well, I'm quite in a good mood so far, handling my anger well and this was approved by my housemates.. Hopefully, I could keep this in pace..πŸ’†
  • Focus on diet..

This one, was still in disaster..! I'm obsessed with Myeondong Topokki's food while the rainy season had  made me to crave for instant noodle and since I still have some packets in my food storage, goodbye diet... Goodbye Imaan Boutique dress... Hopefully February would be kind to me.. 😭

Beauty Review: Etude House My Lash Serum

January 27, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. If you had read my information tag entry, you might know that jawline could turn me on but actually, I always had a thing with eyelashes.. Forget about the gender, as long as they had a perfect long eyelashes, it's enough to make me desirable to pluck them one by one.. πŸ˜‚
Mana bulu mata adik?
Adik ni ada bulu mata ke tak ni? 
Before I was introduce to mascara, I had to face those comments since my eyelashes were too short to be noticed..Even after I'm introduced to mascara, I still had to face the same problem and affordable mascara wouldn't do much for me.. With the eye bags and dark circles, short eyelashes made my eyes less appealing.. Even the lash curler wouldn't help me much.. 😫

It's been months since I'd been considering for getting a lash serum, but my life as a student made me to think back and forth.. I don't want to waste my money on something unworthy so the search took quite some time..  Most of the established serum requires a great amount of money while some of the affordable ones, they're either still new in market or some had doubtful reviews..
Etude House My Lash Serum ft my daily mascara
My search was over when I found out about Etude House Lash Serum.. But the only problem left was it was not available in neither Hermo (only recently it was added on the website) nor Althea and the only alternative for me was to try my luck on Shopee and guess what? With only RM21.90, I found my lashes soul mate.. It's way too affordable for a well-known brand and with good reviews, I wouldn't want to miss it..😌
It comes in a crystal clear bottle and you could always see how much it left.. I'm using it daily before going to bed on both upper and lower lashes. One good thing about this serum is the fact that it didn't sting my eyes at all while the mascara-like applicator make it so handy and so much easier to apply.. 

I wanted to put the picture of the result but with the dark circles whom keep getting darker day by day, it's quite impossible to do so.. So, here's the only picture I could display, hopefully you could see the comparison..

Dalam hati, "tolong la nampak perbezaan dia.. tolong la..."
 I had only been applying the serum for more than 2 weeks and the result is quite visible. My lashes seemed a bit longer and healthier too.. I do notice some new lashes started to appear on my lower lashes,filling the empty spaces.. It's still new for me but I will keep applying this and looking for more progress..😚
P/s: I wanted to update something else but I left my mouse at KL while I'm back to Seremban for several days.. I need my mouse for blogwalking and stuff.. 😭Anyways, I'm still searching for my dark circle's enemy.. πŸ˜‘

Chapter 18: Mind Talks

January 24, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. I'm not sure where to start but oh well, let's just write whatever in my mind right now.. It's been raining throughout the day, and the cold breeze caught me, including my mind.. Not a brain freeze, for sure.. I was waiting for a classmate to stop by as he needs my help to deliver his excuse letter to the lecturer, as he's flying to Japan tomorrow.. What a lucky dude.. πŸ˜’

While waiting, I scrolled down the facebook timeline and stumbled into this;

Reading that, I started to reflect my crush-ing life, how far has it been and in the end, I could conclude, if this quote is true,  I should have been in the case of "tepuk sebelah tangan" for several times.. Okay, Should I cry or laugh right now? 😢

Well, I'm not the "gedik" type whom easily attracted from one guy to another and I would not do anything to attract guys or something.. I would just act cool, and the feelings tend to stay for months or years before I move on.. So in my case, a crush is not a crush at all.. It's love at one side, maybe.. 😩

It's saddening myself after reflecting this but in the same time, I wanted to laugh at myself.. How silly my life could be if I do really trust on the quote.. So yeah, back to my senses and goodbye negative thoughts.. As long as you don't confess your feelings, a crush would always remain as crush, I guess.. 

P/s: If the quote is a true fact, I should be proud with myself.. It means I'm a loyal person.. hahahaha.. πŸ˜‚ 
Nota kaki: Sorry for this random write.. The rain made me lost into deep thoughts.. 

2017 Movie Review - XXX: Return of Xander Cage

January 21, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. The semester had just started and before I got fully occupied with the assignments, it's the best for me to spend some quality time with my friends.. Since we had no class schedule on Friday, we decided for a hang out and catch a movie for an entertainment.. It was a new released movie in line, so I was thinking, why not if I share this with you guys, kan?

 XXX: Return of Xander Cage


Vin Diesel, Donnie Yen, Deepika Padukone, Kris Wu, Ruby Rose, Tony Jaa, Nina Dobrev, Toni Collette, Samuel L. Jackson

A chaos of the stolen pandora box caused Xander Cage to make a come back, though he was actually announced as dead.. In order to complete the mission, he collected his old fellows but then, surprise by surprise awaited for him.. 
I entered the cinema with zero knowledge about this movie.. My friend was eager to watch this, as she was eager to watch Kris Wu and being a good friend, I agreed to accompany her..My mind went more blank when the cashier asked, "Semua dah lebih 18 ke?", being a random Malaysian, my mind immediately thought that it would be an 18sx movie.. πŸ˜…

I should had caught the momentum, since Vin Diesel are there, what else should I expect other than action movie? Sorry for my noob-ie mind.. But oh well, I have to say, this was a great movie and I really enjoy it.. There's no denial that Vin Diesel is one of the best when it comes to action genre and I love the fact that actors from various countries were involved.. I would say, I love every character from the antagonist to protagonist as each of them played their role perfectly.. 

Well, the only weakness that I found was at the climax part where the best fight occur. They made it a bit draggy, accompanied by loud musics without any dialogue, and all they were doing fighting while the main actresses was showing their unity and skills in fighting the protagonist..  It's hard to explain this, which is why you need to watch it by yourself.. *marketing strategy menjadi tak? *πŸ˜†
Self Rating:★★★★☆Overall, it would still be in my favourite movie list, and believe me, it's worth every penny for this good movie.. 

Chapter 17: Rant on Life

January 18, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. Life had been harsh to me lately.. Nothing comforts me and it's been years since I had this feeling.. I'm feeling empty and Idk, probably too tired of everything.. Guess it's gone together while I was in "drapetomania" mode? 😷

I had been back to my student life as the senior year at KUPTM KL since last Monday and to be frank, I'm not having fun at all.. I woke up everyday, motivated to become a good student but end up being a sleepy and grumpy student. πŸ˜ͺ

Is it because of the new surroundings, the unfriendly classmates? Or probably it's due to the fact that we suddenly had to be in the short course, and the school practicum was faster than we expected? I had no idea.. 

All I know that I'm in a rush semester and it marks that another stressful semester would be chasing me.. On a positive thoughts, I would probably graduate this year, finishing all 6 semesters that was expected to be completed only by the end of this year..  Graduating few months earlier ain't a bad idea after all, isn't it? 😩

Oh well, I hope my spirit is back as soon as possible.. It's tiring to feel sleepy all day, being unmotivated and all sorts of negative vibes.. Dear self, please be more productive since your journey on this year ain't getting easier.. Sincerely, yourself..πŸ’•

Chapter 16: Drapetomania

January 15, 2017

" Aku terima nikahnya ..." 
and she couldn't hear the rest of the words anymore... Tears started to roll down on her cheeks and her heart was screaming loudly inside.. She felt like bursting out loud but she wouldn't want to ruin the mood.. Why did she feel that way?

It's the final wedding before her and now, as she's the only unmarried child,  she felt lost on her own.. She was able to hold herself from losing further and acted like she was fine.. But the feeling won't last forever.. Her heart screamed louder when it was the moment for the family portrait event..
"Okay, grab your partner and get ready for the picture.."
While all of her siblings were busy to get into position of their own partner, she was left alone, sitting at  the center position all on her own, pretending to be laughing while her heart and mind were totally losing itself.. Her tears were still there but people thought it was because she laughed too much..
Right after the session was over, she tried hard to heal herself but the crowd made it worst.. She wouldn't bother for any words mentioning that her turn would be next, as clearly, she was the only one left in the family.. 
"eh, cari la sekarang kat kolej, cari yang sama course, baru senang nak berkenalan.."
"Nanti la.. Jauh lagi perjalanan.. Diploma pun belum habis.."
"Carik je.. Buat apa tunggu lama-lama.."
Can't people just leave her alone? She already had a harsh feeling but how could people make it worst? 
Drapetomania is all she has now.. Hopefully, she would feel better soon.. 
Drapetomania; an overwhelming urge to run away.. 

Chapter 15 : Budi Bahasa Budaya Kita..?

January 10, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. I bet that the paragraph above ain't something new to some of us.. It is part of the lyric of "Budi Bahasa Budaya Kita" which was sung by our Dato' Siti Nurhaliza.. Back then when the song was part of the major campaign, my school made it as one of the compulsory song for us to sing, with the hope that we would imply the values in our life.. Well, we actually had fun singing this at first, having the feeling that we nailed the song with our toad-like voices.. πŸ˜‚

Alright, before I went off track, allow me to just go straight to the point.. Frankly writing (as i'm not speaking right now) , I feel that the lyric didn't reflects us, the Malaysian anymore.. I would say, the modernization caused us to become part of the scary judgmental community.. 

Nowadays, all you need to do is to be prepare just in case you get to be in the spotlight.. Sometimes, benda tu tak salah pun but they will just grab anything, find the mistake, and voila! The next thing you know, people are ready to either bash you or compliment you.. I don't mind if people keep spreading that really needs the attention, something important that needs the spotlight.. 

However, what about those whom doing nothing, and yet they had to receive thousands of hate letters? Quick example, the king coco whom went viral just because she seems like acting to be influent in Malay and just because of that, she went viral, receiving lots of hates just because she can't speak Malay properly.. Seriously, can't you just stop making common people famous for nothing? 

Another quick example;

humour and sarcasm are two different thing, do you actually need a dictionary?
I was scrolling the comments to see any positive comments, till I stumbled to this..
You're stealing someone's shared memory and making fun of it.. Does that really entertain you, Dear fame-hunting page? Actually there are lots of other page claiming they're a funny page and they're really funny at first, but slowly, they went to a sarcasm-fun-page.. 

Dear Malaysian, does bashing people is the fun that you had been seeking? What if your privacy is revealed and the next thing you know, almost everyone had already assembled and pulled you down.. Would you love the drowning feeling? The world is spinning and remember, what goes around comes around.. Hari ni hari orang lain, siapa tau esok hari kau? πŸ€”
Let's just live in a respectful way, shall we? ✌😊

Chapter 14: 2017 To-do List..!

January 5, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. I had been debating with myself either to write this or not, but come to think of it, writing this could be a self reminder to me.. Every year, I had been keeping my resolutions to myself, but oh well, I tend to feel like, meh it's okay.. In the end, I hardly achieve something..

I always need something challenging, a feeling that I was provoked by someone and only by then, the mission would be accomplished.. This year, as my self would be adding another one number, I'm determined to stop being the spoil brat and turn myself somehow into a dependable person..πŸ’ͺ

Stuff that I need do:-
  • Get a part-time job. 
  • 2016 had been such a year, and to be frank, I felt guilty to my dad as he had to bank in some money to me for almost every week for my previous semester! I know that he's fine with it and he always said that it's his responsibility after all, but it's too much for me *cries while thinking of it*.. I need to stop being a burden to him and start finding my own pocket money.. Well, I'm thinking of being a KUMON instructor but oh well, I would call them when the semester starts, soon.. 

  • Start spending wisely. 
  • Random confession: Last year was the year where I'm addicted to lipsticks.. And now, with more than 15 in my collection, I should stop for awhile.. Somehow, this would help me to save some money this year since I might not need to spend on any make ups for like, half a year? Goodbye Hermo.. See you when I see you.. 

  • Start saving money.
  • I know this is similar to the upper point but it's still a two different thing..πŸ˜†
    Well, I might start with the money saving challenge soon but first, since I'm getting my first income from VASE today, the money would immediately goes into my moneybox.. Please make more survey for me vase.. I need more pocket money.. 

  • Continue writing my book.
  • Aite, to be frank, years ago before I stop writing, I used to write a mini series on my blog.. Most of my blogger colleague were supporting me to turn it into a novel but somehow, I started to vanish and only now, I'm thinking to just continue it and make it to the end.. Apparently, I'm still lost somewhere, trying to get back to the senses and hopefully, I would manage to back on the track..  Fyi, it's in Malay, and it's making me in a harder situation as I barely write in Malay nor reading the novels now.. .. *opens the malay novels and check the writing style*😷
  • Stop being an angry bird.
  • Honestly, I am quite a short-tempered person but I tend to keep it to myself at first. However, I would be one of the grumpiest person in the world and once I exploded, I would no longer tolerate with it.. I know my temper would make some people around me less comfortable so this year, I would try to fill the patience vibe in me.. 

  • Focus on diet.
  • This is not a new fun fact since I'm already on the journey but it's been a disaster lately.. So     yesterday, I start to get back on track and hopefully, I could maintain this till I reach the target.. Goodluck dearself..!πŸ˜₯

  • Have the best memory with them.
2 years plus living with le'housemates and a year plus with my best buddies
There's less than 365 days left and minus the holiday, It would be less than 300 days left for us.. We won't know what the future is waiting so it's the best for me to create more memories with them.. Last semester was a mess and cause a chaotic to our relationship so hopefully, this year, the bond gets stronger than before.. ☺

Featured Chapters: Vase of Money

January 3, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. Earning and save some money is one of my resolution for this year.. I'm planning to get focus on my writing, (besides blogging) and try to gain some money from it.. But one problem awaits is, how I could manage my time when the college started? Writing a whole book ain't an easy task and it might take months or years for it, and what if it's being rejected? 😰

Okay, it would be totally a long journey for me so let's forget about getting huge money for a while.. With this situation, every penny is valuable in my life.. Somehow, when life is miserable, Allah would always help you to find it's way.. It's not much of money but as long as your bank account filled with money,  it would still be helpful, right? 

Allow me to introduce you to vase, a website which gives you pocket money each time you answer their survey and every answer is value with money.. πŸ˜‰

Three simple steps, and you're ready to collect some money.. I'm doubtful with this stuff at first and I playfully registered this, without thinking that it's real till I received this on my mail just now: 

An email informing there's a survey available for me, and after answering them, I received the next email from them, claming that: 
Some pocket money is on their way!!! What are you waiting for? Let's make some pocket money with Vase  now.. πŸ’•

Chapter 13: Closing Chapter 2016

January 1, 2017

Assalammualaikum.. Since this would be the last entry of the year, it's the best for me to sum up everything, burying every memories that I had been going through this year.. There were lots of bittersweet moment but on thing for sure, they developed a better version of mine.. πŸ’ͺ

  • Blogging
I had been abandoning this beloved blog for years, and I didn't think that my action of making a total makeover, hiding the fact that it used to have the bitter memories, could make my spirit goes to this level.. And now, I just don't want to stop writing.. Well, not for now.. Getting to make some new blogging friends and knowing that I had some readers just lighten up the spirit.. I love you guys.. *sending the virtual hugs*

  • Baby steps to a healthy lifestyle
Well, as some of you know, I'm on the weight lose journey but I couldn't hold my desire sometimes.. You could never say no to your mom's cook so it's been a huge challenge for me! Dear self, you had done your best.. πŸ˜‡

  • My Best Sister's Marriage
Being the last child of the family, I hardly had a quality time with my siblings except for Ateh, the one whom had always been my back bone, supporting her one and only younger sister in whatever I'm doing.. She's the one whom had been listening all of my complaints about life and her house is my escapism from everyone.. I'm glad that she ended her single life and I couldn't be more happy for her.. Oh well,  I couldn't say no to a guy whom would bring his future sister in law (at that moment) to most of their dates, treating her like his own sister, could you? Psst, I even managed to get pocket money from him, few hours after their wedding ceremony.. Isn't he's so cool? πŸ˜†
  • 1st birthday surprise!
To be frank, this was my first birthday surprise in my life and I was totally shocked when two of my favourite buddy, Ecah and Wani (haven't had the chance to introduce them yet) planned for this.. It was actually double surprise as they had been planning together but since Wani's birthday was only few days after mine and it was going to be a mid-sem break for us, Ecah ended up buying 2 slices of cake.. In the end, double surprise for us.. 😍

double kiss for her best effort.. 
It was simple, but one of the best memory I could have.. I'm so glad that they came to my life.. 
  • Double trouble with housemates 
It's been two years since we met and lived together.. I'm glad to be among them as they totally accept me for who I am.. This year had been a huge challenge for us since one of us became the "ragut" victim and few days later, a burglar (the same person whom had "ragut") broke into our house and managed to get one laptop.. What made it extra bitter, the owner of the laptop, which happened to be my roommate and two others were actually face to face with the burglar as they met right in front of the house door.. But they couldn't think right as he said, "Pergi tengok kawan korang kat atas, apa dah jadi dekat dia," and they just immediately rushed inside, worrying about what had happened to the "kawan".. As the matter fact, he actually lied and no one was at home atm, so he managed to go out safely without getting caught! 

  • Real mystical, ghost experience
Yup! This is the year where I faced lots of mystical incidents, disturbance of the entities in my rented house till we had to call an ustaz for help. The traumatic incident didn't end there as if you had read this post, I had stated that we had to end our biggest project due to an unexpected incident and for everyone's safety. It was actually because we made our performance at Muzium Negara and some of the team was possessed by the entities.. It would be a long story but maybe I would tell you the whole story sooner or later.. 

2016, you had been a challenging year but, thank you for every experience and the memories that you had granted to me.. Goodbye 2016, and we shall not meet again.. Welcome 2017! Please come in and could you throw the glitters ✨and rainbow🌈 for me, please..? πŸ’—
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