by Flavnesz

Chapter 32: Living in the past..?

March 12, 2017
Assalammualaikum..

 It's quite hard me for to write now (hard as if, how should I start or what should I write), due to my previous post but somehow, I guess I need to update, just to let you know that I'm fine and that emotional feelings didn't last longer.. No worries.. Special thanks to those whom commented on the post as they totally heal me up with such kind words and supports.. You guys're the best.. 😭

Well, out of all of the comments, Syed's comment ( I don't think I should promote him anymore since he's literally one of the famous blogger now.. haha..) totally gave an idea to reconcile a thing.. I'm not living in my past, it's just the memories re-appeared that night..


I was having a girl's talk with one of my housemate and she told me about one of our college mate whom had been crushing on her but already rejected, asking her to just accept him as sort of 'teman tapi mesra..?' ,being the one whom support him and stuff and I guess, with hope that one day, the feelings would be there..

However, this friend of mine is a demure lady so she couldn't understand how that should work.. She didn't understand how having someone by your side could boost you up which is why, I need to use my past as an example and it's just how I'm trapped in the back to the memory lane game..

Reminiscing the past, remembering how strong I used to be before everything ended, those made my mind messed up.. I've actually declared this matter in Chapter 20: Moving On.. I know that my previous post sounds like I'm regretting it, but what else could you expect from an unstable mind of missing someone..? haha..

To be honest, I'm not regretting any of life.. It's just sometimes, I do wonder, how my life would be if I'm choosing the other route.. What would happen if I'm still in ACCA..? What would happen if I insists for not giving ACCA any chance, from the start..? How my life would be if I'm not at this state, right now..? 

It's all about the un-answered question with full marks but one thing for sure, I should never regret with my life.. Why..?

Because my life is ruled by myself.. I'm deciding my own path and which ever route I'm choosing, nothing could be easier as life is all about facing the challenge.. So why should I regret? Just keep moving forward and deal with your life but in the same time,  keep looking at your past.. Not to regret, but to take the lesson and prevent it from occurring again... After all, life is always a wonderful journey and don't forget, there's always a rainbow after a rain..  💕

25 comments on "Chapter 32: Living in the past..?"
  1. So true dear. There's always a beautiful rainbow after a rain. Life is full with challenges. Be bold and keep fighting. Chaiyok Chaiyok 😘

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    1. Ayy chaiyookkk...!! Haha.. Thanks sis..😍

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  2. Oh my, I think we are thinking about similar stuffs these days.(?) Or maybe I am reading articles that kind of related to your posts.

    Wanna share with you two verses I found so interesting and good enough to ponder.

    "Tame those "what if?" demons."
    "You want to forget, but you want to remember. And you know that the healthiest thing is to let go."

    :) Have a great day, awak!

    hanisamanina.com

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    1. Aww I love those verse.. Thanks awak.. 🤗

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  3. Betul tu jangan menyesal dengan jalan yang kita dah pilih.... teruskan memilih jalan yang kita rasa terbaik buat diri kita....

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    1. Hee yup.. Terus buat pilihan dan hadapi dengan tenang.. hehe

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  4. Accepting where you are at this moment is a sign of moving on, thats what I choose to believe and still. Memory game, reminiscing the past is just a memory game :D I don't regret anything anymore. Things happened, and that's it - move on and do better :D

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    1. Well, I am moving on but do I really moving on? It's a question mark that has no answer for me.. haha.. Yes..! Let's just accept the past and step forward.. hee

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  5. kalau boleh tiada istilah menyesal dlm hidup ini... sbb bla rs menyesal, keluar pemikiran (negativity) yg bkn2

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    1. yes, sebab tu kena sentiasa positifkan diri.. hehe

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  6. That's normal for us to re-think about the decision that we already made before. And sometimes regret it, but just take it in positive ways. Maybe, if we take the different decision the situasion might be worst than now. That's might be right?

    Semua yang berlaku pasti ada hikmahnya. ;)

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    1. Well, it might be worse but it might also be better.. But Allah knows the best, kan? hee

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  7. Sorry Anis. I think I had selected the wrong word in my previous comment haha. I should be using "reminiscing" instead of "living". However, I'm glad that it gives you ideas to write a blog post ��

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    1. hahaha.. No worries syed.. Well it's fine with me... Dia punya risau macam Anis marah pulak.. haha

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  8. yes true. everything happened with reasons. so do with every options will have different outcomes. we have the right to choose, so no regrets la kan even some may have a not so good outcome. :) but just believe in urself and learn from mistakes. look ahead and keep moving :)

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  9. I read your previous post first after reading this and honestly babe (feeling mcm kawan sendiri betul) just write. Pour out everything. That's why I do my poems. If anything could soothes broken heart, I seriously believe writing is one of it. I'm happy you can look pass it now. Atta girl!

    //awesomeness//

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    1. Heyyy.. I am your friend.. xD
      Ayy ayy!! I don't really do poems but I guess, my messed up could change my mind to a poetry mind whenever I'm miserable.. hehe.. Thanks gurl <3

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  10. i want to console you however i can't , lol cause sometimes i had the same feelings.
    its true, everyone need someone by their side to comfort them at the time of misery :'(

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    1. Aww.. It's okay.. We do need someone by our side but somehow, not everyone could comfort us as how he used to.. kan?

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  11. Kita tak boleh ubah perkara yang dah lepas, tapi kita boleh plan apa yang bakal terjadi. Happy to hear that Anis is moving on. Be strong girl and looking forward to a rainbow after a rain <3

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  12. Ya Allah.. Why so touched pagi2 ni. You are addicting me to read all your chapters just from the beginning...Can I?

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    1. Ya Allah kenapa baca pagi2.. kan dah touching.. hahahah.. Sure you may.. Would love to read your comments on my old chapters.. haha

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  13. Aww this post hit me like a truck. My dark past (I only have one and it wasn't about love) sometimes come haunting me too but I'm just hopeless to avoid and let it go. Still trying though :'( I honestly think I don't have any regret in life too except for this one dark past I have, haha. Sad.

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